Be the Ball: Great Golf Quotes
From “be the ball” to “get in the hole,” generations of players, fans, and haters have had ample time to utter some pretty great golf quotes about our favorite game. So we decided to take a look back at 400 years of babble from old timers, copy-catting club hounds, and four-letter-word rants from the all time greats to bring you our favorite golf quotes. Not everything you hear on a golf course was said by a real person, however, and we’ve gone the extra mile to include some classic quotes from golf movies that are near and dear to many hearts. Let’s get to the parlance of our times.
Golf Legends
Golf has never been a cheap game (at least not in the same way that soccer, cricket, baseball or basketball are), and with its legendary status as a pastime of the wealthy, has recruited some pretty famous names into its ranks. The quotes below are a historical record of sorts, and come courtesy of dignitaries, statesmen, players, and analysts of the sport. And if you’re a golf history nut, don’t miss our deep dive into vintage golf clubs.
Winston Churchill
“Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose.”
H.G. Wells
“The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf. It’s almost a law.”
Jack Nicklaus
“A perfectly straight shot with a big club is a fluke.”
Bobby Jones
“A leading difficulty with the average player is that he totally misunderstands what is meant by concentration. He may think he is concentrating hard when he is merely worrying.”
David Feherty
“Watching Phil Mickelson play golf is like watching a drunk chasing a balloon near the edge of a cliff.”
Lee Trevino
“You don’t know what pressure is until you play for five bucks with only two bucks in your pocket.”
And because Trevino is such a legend, we put two quotes on this list:
“If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.”
Tiger Woods
“No matter how good you get, you can always get better — and that’s the exciting part.”
Gary Player
“The more I practice, the luckier I get.”
Greg Norman
“Happiness is a long walk with a putter”
Be the Ball: Quotes from Golf Movies
Of course, golf quotes cannot be limited to the "real" world. Popular culture has gripped humanity since the creation of populace, and has been going downhill ever since. While none of these quotes were said by a person who wasn't created in some faraway writers room, they are likely to be more repeated, more loved, and more egregiously overused by golfers and non-golfers alike. For that reason, and for that reason alone, these must be on the list of great golf quotes (also, who doesn't love these movies?). It is from our favorite fictional golf characters that we received some of the most important golf quotes in this article.
Happy Gilmore
Happy Gilmore (1996) is one of those films where the quotes almost precede the film. While most of us here are old enough to remember the film's release, it's not hard to imagine a scenario in which a young golfer uses one of the following legendary quotes without realizing that it was written by a 30 year old Adam Sandler. Even more startling to those older readers among us is that Sandler was 30 when Happy Gilmore came out. While not an ode to golf etiquette, many people appreciate Sandler’s irreverent take on the gentleman’s game.
Harness the good energy
Gary Potter (Kevin Nealon): "Gary Potter, great to have you on the tour, Happy. I feel a lot of solid energy coming out of you. Good positive aura. Great, great, it's all great."
Gilmore: "Yeah yeah nice to meet you, man. Is it always like this with all the TV cameras and the people and stuff?"
Potter: "Yeah, A lot of pressure. You gotta rise above it. Harness in the good energy, block out the bad. Harness. Energy. Block. Bad. Feel the flow, Happy. Feel it, It's circular. It's like a carousel. You pay the quarter, you get on the horse it goes up and down and around. Circular. Circle. With the music, the flow. All good things."
Chubbs Peterson on Putting:
"It's All in the Hips"
No golf coach will ever be as legendary as the one-handed Chubbs Peterson (Carl Weathers), and for good reason. No golf pro could ever hope to turn a washed up hockey player into a champion golfer in under a year. Maybe it really is all in the hips…
More Putting Wisdom
Chubbs: "Don't worry about it, you're still in good shape. All you gotta do is just tap it in. Just taap it in, now. Hey - just taaap it in.
Gilmore: "Just tap it in. Just Taap it in. Give it a little tappy. Tap tap taperoo."
Taunting your rivals
Gilmore: "Somebody's cloooser"
If you're a millennial golfer, it would be unlikely that you've never been hounded by a competitor (or close friend) whose ball happens to be a little nearer to the hole than yours with this classic jab. Of course, for full effect, they will likely employ Sandler's trademark high-pitched voice and, if they're a good friend, say it really close to your ear, reminding you of the grave error you made in choosing them as a friend.
Happy's Happy Place
Greg Norman was definitely onto something when he implied that hitting a long shot onto the green is as close to nirvana as a golfer can probably get. That being said, not every shot will require a long, triumphant walk to the green. Some of us hit shots deep into the weeds, ricochet off of tree trunks, or onto a neighboring hole's fairway. In those moments, it's important that we channel Gilmore and find our own little Happy Place
Caddyshack
The GOAT. It is unlikely that you would be reading a golf quote article without having seen this legendary golf film. Inspired by Brian Doyle Murphy's (Bill's older brother) experiences as a caddy during his teenage years, Caddyshack (1980) has inspired a cult following unlike any other sports film before it.
Set on the snobbish, but utterly wacky Bushwood Country Club, Caddyshack is technically about the young, working class caddies who rub elbows with elite members all summer long. However, bit parts played by Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Rodney Dangerfield and Ted Knight completely steal the show. While you might not be able to play historic Bushwood, you can still pay homage to the classic track with this replica t-shirt from Crazy Dog.
On Keeping Score In Golf
At some point in our golf careers, we've probably all thought about ditching the scorecard in favor of a less frustrating means of play. Luckily, the layabout heir of Bushwood has things all figured out.
Judge Smails (Knight): "Ty, what did you shoot today?"
Ty Webb (Chase): "Oh, Judge, I don’t keep score."
Smails:" Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?"
Webb: “By height."
Be The Ball
The quote we all came here for. Our eponymous quote likely didin't originate from Caddyshack, but it's vaguely zen koan sounding wisdom was best delivered by prime Chevy Chase. Perhaps this is what Bobby Jones meant when he said that average players mistake concentration for worry. Or maybe, Ty Webb's truth nugget is meant to teach us not about mastering golf, but about mastering ourselves…
Ty Webb: "I’m going to give you a little advice. There’s a force in the universe that makes things happen. And all you have to do is get in touch with it, stop thinking, let things happen, and be the ball."
Work on your posture
Webb isn't all about existentially profound golf wisdom. Sometimes, he's just really good at insulting snobs. So if you ever find yourself in a locker room, or out on the course with a guy who's a little too full of himself, hit him with this Ty Webb zinger:
Smails: "You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he’s been club champion for three years running and I’m no slouch myself."
Webb: "Don’t sell yourself, short Judge, you’re a tremendous slouch."
- Anonymous
Not everyone who said something wise about golf was a pro, business magnate, or a movie character. Sometimes the best ideas come from the quietly dedicated guy who putters up and down the same 18 holes every day without breaking into the 80’s. Golf is a beautiful game that can be played just as beautifully in solitude as it can as part of a team or in a tournament. So to all the anonymous golfers out there just trying to enjoy the game, get a little better, or just relax for a few hours a week, this last one’s for you.
“Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.”
Golf is a game that is played on a 5-inch course, according to Bobby Jones (he was talking about the space between your ears), so we hope these quotes will give you something positive to think of on your next round. Did we miss one of your favorites? Call us out by dropping it in the comments!
And remember, a bad round of golf is better than any good day in the office, so stop worrying about the state of your game and appreciate the fact that you can still play it!
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